Turn Resistance to Change into a Strength by Traversing the ‘Gates of Grief’
In a world of change where the only constant often feels like more change and uncertainty, how do we navigate these experiences with greater wholesomeness? Many of us often respond to this change in a myriad of ways, and though not all resistance to change is grief, a huge portion that is associated with the experience is unacknowledged loss.
Every meaningful transition, whether it be personal or professional, even the positive ones, involves some form of loss. This can include loss of an old identity, a familiar routine, a relationship dynamic, or a sense of certainty. That loss quietly triggers grief, but because it is often subtle, people don’t recognize it for what it is. We rationalize it as… we just ‘feel off, unsettled, or resistant’. Instead of processing those emotions, we may turn to busyness—focusing on productivity, planning, or constant distraction—to avoid feeling the discomfort. But avoided grief doesn’t disappear; it resurfaces as anxiety, procrastination, irritability, or a persistent sense of being stuck.
What we often label as “fear of change” is, at its core, unprocessed grief. The real shift comes when we stop asking why change feels so hard and start asking what we’re losing that we haven’t allowed ourselves to grieve. Ultimately, navigating change isn’t just about strategy—it’s about developing the capacity to feel and process loss, because unfelt grief blocks transition, while felt grief allows movement.
In this presentation, participants will be introduced to the work of Frances Weller, who introduces the “Gates of Grief” and highlights that grief has multiple entry points—not just major loss, but also the parts of ourselves we’ve denied, the sorrows of the world, ancestral pain, and unmet expectations.
Learning Objectives:
1. Understand the connection between change and grief
2. Identify avoidance patterns like busyness & recognize how constant activity, productivity, and distraction can function as ways to avoid processing grief.
3. Apply the “Gates of Grief” framework to real situations
Location:
Lehigh Valley Health Network/ Jefferson Health
Center For Healthcare Education
3900 Sierra Circle
Center Valley, PA
Speaker
Jessica Liu, PhD:
